[Editorial] grand stand -> grandstand
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@ -18,7 +18,7 @@
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<p>The literary editor helped the little lady upon a stool and began:</p>
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<p>“Once upon a time, in immediate proximity to a primeval forest, in an humble abode, where pleasures of a bucolic existence were profitably mingled with the more laborious task of agricultural pursuits, dwelt Jack, the hero of my tale, with his widowed maternal progenitor. Scarcely of a parsimonious nature, yet perforce of economic character, the widow was compelled to resort to numerous expedients in order to prolong existence. She was the possessor of a bovine quadruped of most excellent virtues. Her generous store of lacteal fluid, her amicable and pacific nature, and her gentleness of demeanor had endeared her to both Jack and his mother. But, alas, the exigencies of the situation soon demanded that they part with their four-footed friend, and to Jack the sorrowful duty was delegated to lead with lacerated bosom and audible lamentations their bovine benefactor to the market, to be bartered for the more indispensable necessaries of life. So Jack—”</p>
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<p>“Say,” said the little girl, “when is ’ou doin’ to tell me dat ’tory?”</p>
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<p>“See here,” said the sporting editor, coming over from his desk, “you can’t expect a kid like that to get a place on such a heavy track as yours. Your talk is all right for the grand stand, but you outclass that five-year-old. What’s the lay you’re on, anyway?”</p>
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<p>“See here,” said the sporting editor, coming over from his desk, “you can’t expect a kid like that to get a place on such a heavy track as yours. Your talk is all right for the grandstand, but you outclass that five-year-old. What’s the lay you’re on, anyway?”</p>
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<p>“Tan ’ou tell me Dack, the Diant Killer?” asked the little girl, apparently favorably impressed with the goodhumored smile of the sporting editor.</p>
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<p>“You can gamble on that, sissy,” said that cheerful gentleman, taking her on his knees. “And I’ll put it to you low down, right over the plate, without any literary curve to it.”</p>
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<hr/>
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@ -48,7 +48,7 @@
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<p>“I says to myself, ‘White man, if I’m not mistaken there’s been a bait laid out where the tail of your eye could see it.’</p>
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<p>“That night, according to arrangements, me and Henry took the phonograph to a room in a ’dobe house in a dirty side street, where the grass was knee high. ’Twas a long room, lit with smoky oil lamps. There was plenty of chairs, and a table at the back end. We set the phonograph on the table. Mellinger was there, walking up and down, disturbed in his predicaments. He chewed cigars and spat ’em out, and he bit the thumb nail of his left hand.</p>
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<p>“By and by the invitations to the musicale came sliding in by pairs and threes and spade flushes. Their colour was of a diversity, running from a three-days’ smoked meerschaum to a patent-leather polish. They were as polite as wax, being devastated with enjoyments to give Señor Mellinger the good evenings. I understood their Spanish talk—I ran a pumping engine two years in a Mexican silver mine, and had it pat—but I never let on.</p>
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<p>“Maybe fifty of ’em had come, and was seated, when in slid the king bee, the governor of the district. Mellinger met him at the door, and escorted him to the grand stand. When I saw that Latin man I knew that Mellinger, private secretary, had all the dances on his card taken. That was a big, squashy man, the colour of a rubber overshoe, and he had an eye like a head waiter’s.</p>
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<p>“Maybe fifty of ’em had come, and was seated, when in slid the king bee, the governor of the district. Mellinger met him at the door, and escorted him to the grandstand. When I saw that Latin man I knew that Mellinger, private secretary, had all the dances on his card taken. That was a big, squashy man, the colour of a rubber overshoe, and he had an eye like a head waiter’s.</p>
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<p>“Mellinger explained, fluent, in the Castilian idioms, that his soul was disconcerted with joy at introducing to his respected friends America’s greatest invention, the wonder of the age. Henry got the cue and run on an elegant brass-band record and the festivities became initiated. The governor man had a bit of English under his hat, and when the music was choked off he says:</p>
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<p>“ ‘Ver-r-ree fine. <i xml:lang="es">Gr-r-r-r-racias</i>, the American gentleemen, the so esplendeed moosic as to playee.’</p>
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<p>“The table was a long one, and Henry and me sat at the end of it next the wall. The governor sat at the other end. Homer <abbr class="name">P.</abbr> Mellinger stood at the side of it. I was just wondering how Mellinger was going to handle his crowd, when the home talent suddenly opened the services.</p>
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@ -14,8 +14,8 @@
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<p>So the king fell into a furious rage, so that none durst go near him for fear, and he gave out that since the Princess Astla had disobeyed him there would be a great tourney, and to the knight who should prove himself of the greatest valor he would give the hand of the princess.</p>
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<p>And he sent forth a herald to proclaim that he would do this.</p>
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<p>And the herald went about the country making his desire known, blowing a great tin horn and riding a noble steed that pranced and gamboled; and the villagers gazed upon him with awe and said: “Lo, that is one of them tin horn gamblers concerning which the chroniclers have told us.”</p>
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<p>And when the day came, the king sat in the grand stand, holding the gage of battle in his hand, and by his side sat the Princess Astla, looking very pale and beautiful, but with mournful eyes from which she scarce could keep the tears, and the knights who came to the tourney gazed upon the princess in wonder at her beauty, and each swore to win her so that he could marry her and board with the king. Suddenly the heart of the princess gave a great bound, for she saw among the knights one of the poor students with whom she had been in love.</p>
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<p>The knights mounted and rode in a line past the grand stand, and the king stopped the poor student, who had the worst horse and the poorest caparisons of any of the knights, and said:</p>
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<p>And when the day came, the king sat in the grandstand, holding the gage of battle in his hand, and by his side sat the Princess Astla, looking very pale and beautiful, but with mournful eyes from which she scarce could keep the tears, and the knights who came to the tourney gazed upon the princess in wonder at her beauty, and each swore to win her so that he could marry her and board with the king. Suddenly the heart of the princess gave a great bound, for she saw among the knights one of the poor students with whom she had been in love.</p>
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<p>The knights mounted and rode in a line past the grandstand, and the king stopped the poor student, who had the worst horse and the poorest caparisons of any of the knights, and said:</p>
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<p>“Sir knight, prithee tell me of what that marvelous shaky and rusty-looking armor of thine is made?”</p>
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<p>“Oh, king,” said the young knight, “seeing that we are about to engage in a big fight, I would call it scrap iron, wouldn’t you?”</p>
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<p>“Ods bodikins!” said the king. “The youth hath a pretty wit.”</p>
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@ -29,7 +29,7 @@
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<p>“Then,” said the knight, “I will ask you this: I have bought the patent rights in your kingdom for Schneider’s celebrated monkey wrench and I want a letter from you indorsing it.”</p>
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<p>“You shall have it,” said the king, “but I must tell you that there is not a monkey in my kingdom.”</p>
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<p>With a yell of rage the victorious knight threw himself on his horse and rode away at a furious gallop.</p>
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<p>The king was about to speak when a horrible suspicion flashed upon him and he fell dead upon the grand stand.</p>
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<p>The king was about to speak when a horrible suspicion flashed upon him and he fell dead upon the grandstand.</p>
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<p>“My God!” he cried, as he expired, “he has forgotten to take the princess with him.”</p>
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</section>
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</body>
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